Wifey Hyphy Hype.

In my vain attempts to get rid of the monsters in my head, I decided to get my lip pierced and a haircut. All in one day. (No biggie.)

The monsters are still here. Next step.

The Bible.

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I decided to do my own little study of Proverbs 31 (not sure when it'll end, but still having at it!). More specifically, Proverbs 31: 10-31 "A Wife of Noble Character." Or more accurately, "The Virtuous Wife" (NKJV). Wow. I can picture it now: me riding on a horse galloping down a road to my prince charming. Jigga man.

Anyways... I LOVE it! As most of you know, I used to talk about marriage and my own personal obsession with the idea of my husband and I for awhile now. That was then. This is now.

I stopped. No marriage, no planning, no hopes, no nada. Lightweight. The idea of marriage has become my enemy and has been the vehicle to many disappointments. Instead, I figured I should stop focusing on getting married, and gear up on what I can do now: becoming a "virtuous woman"-- riding on my horse. Ha!

I LOVE it. (again.)

I've only read a few notes on that portion of scripture, but from the basics to the "non-essentials" (bah-- I've grown to hate that word) to the random facts, I love reading God's Word as He teaches me what it means to be a wife. A woman. WORD.

I read this in a commentary and it got me thinking...

"Though she is a woman of spirit herself, yet her desire is to her husband, to know his mind, that she may accommodate herself to it, and she is willing that he should rule over her." (MHC)

The Bible always seems to confront us with little conflicting ideas that are sometimes hard to grasp. In order to live in Christ, we must die to ourselves. Be in the world, but not of the world.

And then there's... women.

My boy D felt that women were God's first and most precious gift to men. In that same sense, women are encouraged to live these lives that are strong, yet gentle and quiet; understanding, but not too passive; independent, yet dependent on her man.

And I feel that's the beauty of having life in Christ. That, more specifically, as women, we are fragile and precious-- not only to God, but to the men we marry-- yet we are, in a sense, called to maintain a life that is strong, able, and... tolerant. (Bah!)

"To know his mind..." To know my husband's mind. At first I thought this was a selfish notion, that one must not consider another so much and be so accommodating to another person, let alone a man. Ha. But after careful thought and most importantly, seeing it through an eternal lens, I discovered this humbling and obedient act to love. Love God and follow His words, which thus follows with my willing love for my husband.

Whether it's ironing his clothes on his bed (ha!) or quietly cheering him on during a hard day, the "role" of a wife is no longer existent, but rather an expression of love to our Father and to the man I hope to spend the rest of my life with.

And to know his mind... ah, that gets me. I love it. It's exciting. I feel that some would view this never ending journey to be an exhausting and weakening act, but I cannot wait to know what makes my husband laugh and smile, what causes pain and what makes him irate and irked. I used to view this certain "wife-like" lifestyle in a sort of servant way; and be that as it may, but that's the beauty of it all. That was the beauty of Christ's life here on Earth, our responsibilities as Christians, and yes, my anticipation as a wife.

There is no end to knowing my husband's mind. So onward I follow, my marriage is going to be forever and THRIVING. Best believe.

Husband-- I got you. Don't trip.

=]